Autism…Key and Lock Theory
I have written these natural remedy blogs for almost eighteen months. At times, I have written about topics related to autism. I have finally decided to take on an autism series. This is a hard topic to write about because it’s so personal. So, before I wrote about my own journey, I thought I would take this week to write about Elizabeth. Before, I write anything else, I want to acknowledge that every autistic parent has a different experience with different successes and failures. I do not want my story in any way to reflect on their experiences, beliefs, or outcomes. I like to compare having an autistic child to the scene from the first Harry Potter movie. In that scene, Harry is frantically trying to find the right flying key to fit the locked door.
When Elizabeth was originally diagnosed as profoundly autistic at age 3, I was in my thirties. I also had another new baby. I was that working mom juggling new babies and toddlers. I like to call it “boot camp”. I had that notion that something was wrong. My husband refused to believe it, even once the diagnosis was received and a second opinion validated the first one. I never questioned the diagnosis because I knew before we received it. A mom just knows something is wrong. The truth is that I knew she was different within six weeks of birth. She had idiosyncrasies that were evident from the beginning.
What I chose not to accept is the prognosis. I was told that Elizabeth would never be mainstreamed. It was wise to look at special needs schooling long term now. I listened but did not agree. In my mind, that was not going to be the outcome. My best friend and Elizabeth’s God parent, Judy, always told me, “Elizabeth has been given to you for a reason. God is trusting you with a soul that He plans to work through. She is special. She is meant for something big. I can’t explain why, I just know.”
I have always held onto that conversation. No matter what limitations were communicated to me, I just knew it was going to be different. There was no doubt in my mind. I remember looking at her sleeping and thinking, “Elizabeth, I am not giving up on you. I know you have something big to do – no matter what they say. And, you will get there. I am going to make sure of it.”
Elizabeth received her class ring last night. She is a junior that is dual enrolled in high school and college. She plans to be a chemical engineer. She wants to develop medications or devices that save lives. As she approaches her senior year, she will have the majority of her time dedicated to college enrollment. She has learned to speak in front of people. She loves to sing. She runs cross country at her pace. She has a purity and innocence to her soul that makes you a better person.
Elizabeth is not on a single medication outside of vitamins. Over the next weeks, I will discuss many natural options that worked in our home. And I will disclose the data that I used to make those decisions. It doesn’t mean that they are the only options. But, many of them do have strong data to support their use. Many people may not be aware that they exist or are effective.
I’d like to close with this. As a mother of a special needs child, I am forever changed in ways that cannot be articulated. Humbleness, patience, kindness, tenacity, persistence, hope, positivity, resilience are balanced against weariness, fatigue, frustration, anxiety and fear become weekly experiences and thoughts. However, these complex emotions get washed away with one of Elizabeth’s satisfied big smiles that beam with each hurdle she wins.
Over these next couple of weeks, I will be writing about natural solutions for autism but it also a chapter of our personal journey together.
“See” you next week!
